NOTE: This piece was first published on November 17, 2021, following the massacre of Nigerians who were peacefully protesting Police Brutality in Nigeria. It was the second in a series on Police reform in Nigeria


Greetings, folks!

I am Harry Agina, and this is No Bullshitting, the radical Socio-Political Critic of Nigeria. You already know that “No Bullshitting” is not a news blog, but it does feature lambasting commentaries on trending news topics. This time, my topic is Nigeria’s trending recent release of the report of the Lagos State Panel of Inquiry into the 2020 EndSARS protest in Lagos. And, my slant is the role of Lai Mohammed in the entire saga. Click here, and you will find out:

Just a couple of months back, Nigeria’s Information Minister, who should better be called Propaganda Minister, confessed that his own “seven-year-old grandson” asked him: “Grandpa, why is it that Nigerians call you Lie Lie Mohahammed, instead of Lai Mohammed?” Who knows, maybe the child also asked him why he brands every criticism of his government as “fake news”, but he left that one out in his confession. I know that the two facts are related; liars always accuse people of lying, just as some mad persons are quick to call sane persons mad? Yes, indeed, once upon an encounter in Nigeria, a stark-naked mad dude shouted at me, “Get away from me, you mad man.” I nearly laughed my head off, meeeeeeeeen!!!

Mr. Lai Mohammed lies so much that he is quick to call everybody a liar. He is quick to brand every piece of information or message as “fake news”, as long as it criticizes his government. Anyway, the dude gave us the confession about his grandson himself; so, he cannot call this fake news. As I always say, I don’t even think that President Buhari wants Mr. Mohammed to play the propaganda game in the evil way that he plays it; he just enjoys doing it that way, meeeeeeeeeen!!!

Aside not being fake news, Mohammed’s grandson‘s story here is not a rumor either. If you haven’t seen the confession; not to worry, I have it for you at the end of this piece. And, rather than the truth, Lai Mohammed told the poor little child yet another indirect lie, in defense of himself. “I said to him, don’t mind Nigerians”, he said, making a joke out of it, and drawing some laughter from his audience. It would be great if the child would hear the latest PROVEN reason for grandpa’s nickname, meeeeeeeeen!!!

Yes, indeed, Liar Mohammed’s name is notoriously in the news again, as it broke yesterday morning (November 16, 2021) concerning the October 2020 “massacre” of EndSARS protesters at the Lagos Lekki Tollgate. Lagos State Judicial Panel of Inquiry has officially submitted its FINDINGS and VERDICT to the state governor; and, yes, the verdict states unequivocally that Nigeria Army officers actually “massacred” eleven EndSARS protesters at the Tollgate, and wounded twenty-six others, all of whom were only armed with Nigeria flags and patriotic song of the nation’s national anthem. The report also says that police officers murdered over 90 persons around Lagos, between October 20 and 21, 2021, under the evil guise of quelling the protest.

According to the Panel, the Lekki Tollgate massacre was made even more criminal by a “FINDING” that the officers and some Nigerian authorities quickly got rid of some indicting evidence from the crime scene. This included (1) disposal of the corpses; (2) Washing off all traces of blood; (3) Disposal of bullet shells; (4) “Doctoring” CCTV video recording of the “massacre” scene to get rid of video evidence. Do remember, I did not make any of this up; no sir, no ma’am! The Lagos State panel said so; I am only telling it as I heard it in my No Bullshitting style.

Now, back to my main subject of this blog, the foregoing information exposes Mr. Lai Mohammed as a big liar once again. Anybody who has been following the Lekki Tollgate saga can readily recall the gazillion times that Mohammed told us that all the witnesses were lying about the massacre. And then, of course, he had to do what he knows best, which was to accuse us all of peddling fake news. What an irony! As I have said with my mad man analogy above; a master fake news merchant constantly accuses everybody of creating and peddling fake news. He even went as far as talking a bunch of bullshit about suing America’s Cable News Network (CNN), and threatening it with a sanction that he couldn’t possibly effect, all for speaking what has now been confirmed by the Lagos Panel as truth.

You know, as a professional in the same general field that Liar Mohammed claims to belong, I just can’t believe that a man can be so bereft of craft in a function that he claims to be a professional. I mean, in Mohammed’s function as an Information Minister, or even as the evil Propagandist that he has chosen to be, there is something known as LYING WITHOUT REALLY LYING, which could have made all his lying a little better, if only he knew the craft. For instance, he didn’t have to come out so doggone strong in defending the actions of Nigeria Army at Lekki Tollgate, and lambasting each and everybody that spoke the truth. The son of a gun could have been diplomatic if he had any sense and craft, instead of being an evil propagandist. For instance, at the time of his idiotic comments, he could have said that it was uncertain what had happed at the Tollgate; he could say that they would investigate and find out later. And then, the “later” could extend indefinitely, and subsequently be swept under the carpet as they have always done with every so-called probe of this government. That way, would not make himself such an idiotic liar with public condemnation of his person. That’s how I would protect myself if I had to work for this criminal government. But, as I always say, the mad impunity of many actors in this government does not allow them to think intelligently, because they believe that we can’t do shit to them, meeeeeeen!!!

In conclusion, it behooves me to join all the Nigerians who have given kudos to Lagos State governor, Babajide Sanwo-Olu, for his courage to convene the Panel of Inquiry, and saw it through to the conclusive end, despite his being an APC chieftain as Liar Mohammed and his evil conspiracy gang. The retired judge who led the inquiry, Doris Okuwobi, also deserves a lot of praises. I can almost tell you for sure that they must have gone through tons of pressure to quit the inquiry, from Liar Mohammed and his conspiracy gang. Since the news broke, I have heard tons of Nigerians calling for Mohammed’s resignation, or his sack by Buhari; but you and I know that there is no such thing as honor in Nigerian governments. Sooner than later, the dude will come out stronger with more lies. As always, I trust, that you trust, that I ain’t bullshitting ya, meeeeeeen!!!

Here is a link to a related past blog on the lying legacy of Liar Mohammed:

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *