September 16, 2022
WHAT’S UP FOR ETU’S INFIDEL WIFE AND HER TROUBLEMAKING LOVER?
Greetings, folks!
This is “Afro-Scope,” and I am Harry Agina. “AfroCultural Dramas” is one of Afro-Scope’s efforts to share the African Culture with the rest of the world. Naturally, like in every culture in the world, some African cultural traditions and other elements are good, and some are not so good. Indeed, like in all cultures of the world, some of the traditions are actually downright evil. And then, there are also some good traditions, which bad people practice in bastardized evil ways. Again, this is also true about all the cultures and peoples of the world, too. As we celebrate the good elements of the African Culture, we also expose and condemn the bad ones that need to be cleaned-up, or totally eradicate.
So far, we have already featured one good tradition, polygamy in Africa, which is titled, “The Deal.” Yeah, I know; some peoples of the world do not consider polygamy to be good, and that’s okay, too. As they say, “one man’s meet may be another man’s poison.” But, it is a fact that even those peoples of the world who do not admit that they are polygamous, do actually practice a worse form of it, whereby they maintain concubines outside their known family settings. This is also biblical, mind you, with King Solomon holding the record of 700 wives, and 300 concubines.
Anyway, we have also featured a great African tradition gone bad in the hands of bad guys. That’s in our series titled, “Blowback.” It’s a 5-episodes series on rituals in Africa. This is about bad guys who are murdering their fellow humans to sacrifice to the gods of wealth, in evil efforts to make money. I believe that I’ve told you enough already; please browse to those series in the “AfroCultural Dramas” Category of No Bullshitting Blog (NBB). The good news is that I have made it easy for you, as always. I do have their links at the end of this blog for ya!
Back to the present, our dramatist, Michael Shaibu, has episode 2 of “Boomerang” for ya. At the end of the last episode, we saw one of three friends, Aku, as he was about to ‘spill the beans’ about Etu’s wife’s alleged infidelity to her father, Ilaba. What does Ilaba, Etu’s father-in-law, do with the exposé? Please don’t ask me; let’s all see what our dramatist, Michael Shaibu, has in store, thus:
BOOMERANG 2
- OUTSIDE, ON A VERANDA, AT DUSK.
ILABA IS NOW PREPARING HIS SNUFF, WAITING TO HEAR AKU. ETU AND OTI, STILL SITTING ON THE BENCH, ALSO WAIT TO HEAR HOW AKU WOULD PRESENT ETU’S CASE. AKU IS STILL AT HIS RESPECTFUL SQUATING POSTURE…
AKU: Sir, according to you, our elders, ‘No talk gets too thick that we have to cut it with a knife.’
ILABA: Absolutely! However thick it gets, we still have to break it with the mouth.
AKU: Thank you, sir.
ILABA: Yes, but get to the point now. As you can see, it is getting dark. And I am beginning to notice that, quite unlike you, you are now going about in circles. I suspect the issue is a serious one.
AKU: Maybe, sir. But you elders also say, ‘“We’ve never seen/heard this before” is just used to scare the person having the issue.’
ILABA: Again, you are right. And that is because there is nothing, absolutely nothing, new under the sun.
AKU: Please forgive me for using proverbs. I was brought up to know that children are not meant to use proverbs when presenting issues to elders. But you elders say again that, ‘Proverbs are the vehicles that convey discussions well; and discussions are the vehicles that convey proverbs well.’
ILABA: Correct again. And don’t apologise. ‘Proverbs help to expose issues, and discussions help to explain proverbs.’ But please, get to the point now. I am already getting nervous.
AKU: I am sorry for causing that, sir. But the issue is…uh…uh… your daughter, Etu’s wife is “walking” wrongly!
THERE IS SOME SILENCE AS OLD ILABA DIGESTS THIS…
ILABA (Swallows): Very well. Thank you for being very tactful with the use of words. But please, so as to avoid any doubt at all, I need to know how exactly. Is it that she has begun to gossip or to keep immoral female company or to steal or which?
AKU: It is the worst of them all, sir. The one you didn’t mention. And the man in question is Egodede. In fact, the whole village is talking about it now.
ILABA GIVES AKU A SHARP LOOK, THEN GRADUALLY LOOKS AWAY AND DROPS HIS HEAD IN DESPAIR. A MUCH LONGER SILENCE ENSUES AS AKU RISES AND SITS. FINALLY, ILABA LOSES INTEREST IN HIS SNUFF, KEEPS THE SNUFF BOX AWAY, TAKES A DEEP BREATH, AND LETS OUT A LONG SIGH…
ILABA: To say I am disappointed is a huge understatement. However, so as not to be accused of folly, I must also hear what my daughter has to say. Please, come back about this time tomorrow.
ALL GREET. ETU PICKS AND TAKES THE BENCH BACK INSIDE. THE YOUNG FRIENDS SAY GOOD BYE AND GO AWAY…
- INT. SITTING ROOM. DUSK.
EGODEDE’S FATHER, OLD OBELE, IS LISTENING TO HIGHLIFE ON A SMALL RADIO, DRINKING THE LOCAL BREW BRUKUTU. NOW EGODEDE WALKS IN, GREETS, AND STANDS THERE…
EGODEDE: You sent for, father.
OBELE LOWERS THE VOLUME OF HIS RADIO, PUTS A BIT AWAY FROM HIM, AND TURNS TO FACE EGODEDE…
OBELE: I called you for a discussion. Sit.
EGODEDE: Father, I need to rush off to somewhere. Can we make it later when I get back?
OBELE: No, we cannot. Sit.
EGODEDE: But father, I might get there late. And-
OBELE CUTS HIM SHORT, POINTS WHERE HE WANTS EGODEDE TO SIT. GRUDGINGLY, EGO GOES THERE AND SITS…
OBELE: Have you heard the talk going on the whole village?
EGODEDE: Which particular one? There are many talks going on.
OBELE: The one that has your name featuring prominently. That is the very one I called you so we can discuss. And don’t-
KNOCKS AT THE OPEN DOOR CUT OBELE SHORT. AKU, ETU, AND OTI STAND THERE GREETING…
OBELE: Young men! Come in please!
AKU: Uh…sir, maybe we will need to come back some other time. Let us not cause disruption, sir.
OBELE: No, no, no; this is no disruption at all. Come in.
AKU, ETU, AND OTI CROSS THE THRESHOLD, ENTER. EGODEDE SEES THAT AS AN OPENING AND STANDS PRONTO…
OBELE (To his son): And why did you get up?
EGODEDE: Well, father, you have got guests. I am sure they would prefer discussing alone with you to having me here too.
OBELE (To Aku): Is that true, my son?
AKU, ETU, AND OTI ONLY SMILE GINGERLY AND SHRUG. OBELE THEN NODS “OKAY” FOR EGODEDE TO GO. EGODEDE WALKS OUT AND AWAY. OBELE WAVES THE VISITORS TO SIT…
OBELE: It is already evening. We all live in this small village. And when it is getting dark like this, no one, except my son Egodede, is in any haste. So…let us drink some brukutu before we talk. Hm? What do you say?
AKU: Sir, we have actually had some. But you elders say it is bad manners to turn down goodwill from an elder.
OBELE (Laughs): Good. Your father raised you well.
OBELE POINTS TO CUPS AND THE EARTHEN POT OF BRUKUTU. AKU RISES AND SERVES THE BRUKUTU ROUND. BUT WHEN IT GETS TO ETU, HE POLITELY TURNS DOWN THE DRINK. OBELE NOTICES AND ALSO PUTS HIS OWN DRINK ASIDE. AKU AND OTI DO THE SAME…
OBELE: There is indication that all is not well. And if I say I am totally ignorant, that would make me a hypocrite. I might be anything else, but hypocrite? Nah!
AKU: Thank you, sir.
OBELE: I know you three. And none of you is friends with my son, Egodede. So, seeing you here…if you had had the drink with me, I would have counted everything I have heard as mere gossip.
AKU, ETU, AND OTI ALL SHRUG, REAIN SILENT…
OBELE: Yes, I have heard things. I don’t shut my ears like others do. But…don’t let me shut you up. You came to talk to me. Please, talk to me.
THE FRIDNDS LOOK AT EACH OTHER.
OTI NODS AND THEN ASSUMES THE RESPECTFUL SQUATTING POSTURE…
Fade to black
END
There we go again! Mikey is leaving us in suspense, again. Etu’s father-in-law already knows that his daughter is cheating on her husband with Egodede. And now, Egodede’s father knows for sure, what he had heard as village gossip, that his son is messing around with another man’s wife. So, what next? This is a question that only our dramatis, Mikey, can answer. And, if you don’t tune in next week, you will never know. Let’s keep the date; shall we? This is Harry Agina signing off for now.