December 18, 2022
Afro-Scope—The Magazine
(Directed By Harry Agina)
Greetings, and welcome to Afro-Scope, the telescope that beams on Africa, and the Africans. I am Harry Agina. This is episode 5 of our series on the flip side of polygamy in Africa, which is called polyandry. “What a man can do, a woman can do,” sometimes even better. Lady Zalika is the star of our polyandrous drama series—“Reversed Harem.” She represents the ladies in some African communities where polyandry is normal. The country of Kenya, in East Africa, provides our sample community.
By the end of the last episode, Lady Zalika had taken her courtship of Otieno one step forward by popping the proposal question, “Will you marry me?” He had accepted, and they can now be said to be “engaged.” So, now I can say that Lady Zalika’s harem has grown into two husbands and one almost-husband. But there is an old African adage, which says that “Almost or nearly does not kill a bird.” Your shot either kills the bird, or it doesn’t. So, does Lady Zalika capture Otieno into her harem, or not? Let’s find out what our dramatist, Michael Shaibu, has to say to this question, and other matters in “Reversed Harem,” episode 5.
At the end of episode 4, there was an uneasy silence among the lady and her harem. They were seated in a family conversation in a bar. Lady Zalika (the ‘man’ of the family) had just popped the “Will you marry me” question to Otieno. He last question was directed at her entire harem, thus: “So, where do we begin?” In other words, now that they’re at the point of having a family-structure-and-sundry-matters discussion, where do they begin? So, let’s see where they begin; shall we?
AFROCULTURAL DRAMAS ON POLYAND, “RYREVERSED HAREM,” 5:
- INT. LOUNGE. DAY.
ZALIKA IS STILL WAITING FOR THE MEN TO SPEAK UP, HOLDING HER DRINK, AND LOOKING AT THEM OVER THE TOP OF HER GLASS. MWANGI AND JOHN LOOK AT EACH OTHER, EXPECTING THE OTHER TO TALK. ZALIKA PUTS HER DRINK GLASS DOWN, CLASPS HER HANDS, AND LOOKS POINTEDLY AT THEM…
ZALIKA: Are we really ready to discuss this today?
OTIENO: And I need to get back to the office soon too.
JOHN: Okay. For a start…are we going to have kids?
MWANGI: Aha! That’s a good point to begin with. Are we going to have kids? If we are, how-
ZALIKA (Cuts in): Why don’t you let me answer that first?
MWANGI: Sorry. Go ahead, please.
ZALIKA: Do you want us to have children?
MWANGI/JOHN (In unison): I want children.
ZALIKA: So we will have children.
MWANGI: Well, then that leads to the question I was going to ask: how do we determine whose child is a child?
ZALIKA ONLY BEGINS TO CHUCKLE, SHAKING HER HEAD. THIS GETS BOTH JOHN AND MWANGI PUZZLED, AND THEY LOOK AT EACH OTHER, WONDERING…
MWANGI: Am I missing something? Was that question stupid or something?
ZALIKA (Still chuckling): I wouldn’t use such a harsh word as stupid. But I guess you do know that there is something called ovulation? And that some 99.9% of pregnancies happen through sex during ovulation?
BOTH JOHN AND OTIENO NOD VEHEMENTY. MWANGI JOINS IN THE NODDING…
ZALIKA: So…any more questions as to how we would know who fathers any child? All we need to do is schedule properly…one husband per ovulation period. And the husband whose turn during ovulation leads to pregnancy is the father of the resultant baby.
OTIENO: Besides, guys, let’s not forget that this is the 21st century, and there’s something called genetic test…
ZALIKA (Cuts in enthusiastically): That’s right…paternal tests will do the trick when in doubt.
JOHN/WHANGI (In unison): That’s true.
ZALIKA (Relieved): Settled?
JOHN/MWANGI (In unison): Settled.
ZALIKA TURNS TO OTIENO ASKANCE. OTIENO SHRUGS INDIFFERENCE OR AGREEMENT. ZALIKA NODS AND TURNS TO JOHN AND MWANGI…
ZALIKA: What next?
MWANGI: Family name and headship.
JOHN: Yep! That too.
ZALIKA THINKS A BIT ABOUT THIS THEN TURNS TO OTIENO…
ZALIKA: Tee, do you have an opinion as to this?
OTIENO: Uh…I think that should depend on circumstances.
JOHN/MWANGI (In unison): Such as…?
OTIENO: Uh…I don’t know really. But as I see it, there are several circumstances in which family name and headship count. In the case of children, family name and headship would be that of the biological father of each kid, I suppose.
ZALIKA (Smiles): Absolutely! And while we are still on that, headship there would also entail all financial responsibilities in the upbringing of the children.
OTIENO SMILES, SEEING ZALIKA’S SMARTNESS. MWANGI AND JOHN LOOK AT EACH OTHER, FEELING CONERED…
ZALIKA (Smiling): So…anything else to talk about?
THERE IS SOME SILENCE AS BOTH JOHN AND MWANGI THINK. ZALIKA SIGNALS TO THE BARTENDER. BARTENDER RUSHES OVER TO THEIR TABLE…
ZALIKA: While you two are still thinking, you might as well ask for refills.
ALL ASK FOR REFILLS. THE BARTENDER NODS AND WALKS AWAY…
MWANGI (Cautious and hesitant): Umm…well…in conventional marriages, the man is usually responsible for the financial and material welfare of the spouse being married.
MWANGI STOPS THERE, LEAVING IT HANGING. BUT ZALIKA SMILES TO SHOW SHE GOT THE MEANING…
ZALIKA: Well, in conventional marriages, the spouse being married is usually submissive, sometimes even subservient to the man. Should we adopt both positions, yours, and mine, in this marriage?
OTIENO BURSTS INTO HEARTY LAUGHTER. BOTH JOHN AND MWANGI JOIN AND LAUGH SHEEPISHLY, KNOWING THEY ARE BEING OUTSMARTED. THE BARTENDER RETURNS WITH THEIR REFILLS AND WALKS AWAY…
JOHN: Very well, I guess you have the right response for all our concerns. I think I will rest my case for now.
MWANGI: Actually, I still have one question, at least.
OTIENO: Before you ask that, may I ask a question here?
ZALIKA: Yes, please go ahead, Tee.
OTIENO: Would philandering be viewed as cheating in this arrangement? I mean, what is sauce for the goose should be sauce for the gander too, isn’t it?
ZALIKA (Smiling): And I suppose I am the goose in this case, and what is sauce for me here is variety. Am I right?
OTIENO: To a T, Zalika.
BOTH JOHN AND MWANGI NOD AND SMILE IN AGREEMENT WITH OTIENO…
ZALIKA: Well, it has to be understood that I am not just sampling. I am making commitments. So that is quite different from philandering. I hope I have made some sense?
THEY ALL SHRUG OR NOD AS THEY DRINK IN SILENCE…
ZALIKA (Smiles gingerly): Thank you. And uh…I don’t think I am too comfortable to further discuss these things at such a public place anymore. Can we take whatever is left home?
END
Here we go again. More issues to address. Who does what, and how? It will be great to see how the guys will handle Lady Zalika’s subordination and subservience question. She does seem to be quite easily amenable to issues that the guys spring on her; don’t you think so? For instance, she didn’t really reject the financial responsibility that Nwangi brought up. All that she did was to bring up the fact that whatever that is good for the goose, should be good for the gander in all ramifications. No exceptions!
Apparently, for example, as long as the guys accept to be subservient to her as women are in patriarchal relationships, she’s willing to foot the family bills. How far are the guys ready to go on their own part? For instance, who does the cooking and stuffs like that, which are traditionally “women’s jobs” in chauvinistic patriarchal Africa? What other conditions do the women folk probably feel cheated about in “men’s world” relationships, huh, huh, huh? Some of them probably accept the conditions only because “that’s how it’s supposed to be.”
Questions, and more questions! You can be sure that our dramatis, Mikey, has realist answers that prevail in polyandrous African communities today. Yours is just to keep in touch with Afro-Scope’s “Reversed Harem” series. And what better way is there, than to subscribe and stay informed as we churn out the rest of this series. Not to forget the other InfoTaining AfroCultural varieties on Afro-Scope. If you’re new to “Reversed Harem” please remember that wherever there’s episode 5 of anything, then there must be episodes 1 to 4 lurking somewhere nearby. I do have a link to episode 1 for ya, and it links you to episodes 3 to 4. And be sure to check out all our other AfroCultural InterCultural Exchange drama series, and the other InfoTainment varieties in the house, too. From me, Harry Agina, and on behalf of the rest of the Afro-Scope team, it’s bye for now.
LINK TO EPISODE 6: